Don’t Fade Away

Most of the time when im watching a movie or a TV series, whether im alone or with friends, I always try to understand the characters and then pick which one I would be. Most of the time i can not pick one specific actor because they dont create the characters like real people. They make the people out to be one way and thats it… No changing and no in betweens. The interests are always at one end of the extremes, where they are absolutely obsessed wih something or they hate it. And the people are either mean or nice and nothing in between. The fact is that nobody is like that, I think that directors like to create their worlds in black and white because it’s easier that way but it’s not how the real world works. No person is simply mean or only nice; people vary in how they act and that’s why its so difficult to match my personality with ones that i see on the screen. Honestly, that wasn’t even my point. What I was saying before is that sometimes, and more recently, ive caught myself thinking about the idea that i might not even be one of the main characters. What if im an extra that only gets to be seen by the off chance that the camera man switches directions by accident? Im sure that the extras have their own stories and nice lives… But nobody sees beyond their face. I guess that’s what im afraid of…                                          That im just another extra in the world and that the camera is on someone else’s life. It reminds me of the movie: The Fault in Our Stars. One of the main charcters, Gus talks about how his biggest fear is oblivion and that he wont make a difference in the world. There i go again, referencing my life and ideas to a movie. But he’s right, i think that most people have that fear…. That their life is meaningless and that they are just the background on some other person’s story. But i think that i could live with just making an impact on the people close to me. I mean sure, it would be great to be a famous singer and have people say that your lyrics saved their life but for now…hearing from a friend that i helped them, just by being there…… Is good enough for me.